This war is noise.

In a brief moment.
July 29, 2010, 11:05 pm
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Some things we question, some we take for granted.

20 mins turned into not at all, so did after breakfast.

Im no ones priority, not even to return to a conversation with.

And I feel a little used after last night, like I’ve made a mistake. That I’ve kept making mistakes, wanting to believe what I feel.

Or maybe its what I think I feel.

Or I just dont know.

We’re all finding whats right and whats real I guess.

People will say all the right things, then show you what they really meant with what they do.

I wish I knew how things would be, how I’d feel, how things might work out.

Wish I knew what I was doing.

What anyone was doing, why they were doing it.

I definitely need to write more, I feel like I keep saying it, but I will, something changed today.

I felt normal for about an hour.

I’d cried hard, and felt everything. Then had tea and pancakes.


Monday, Monday.
July 27, 2010, 2:49 am
Filed under: Uncategorized

Went better than I expected :]

Caught up with him, went well :] and should be catching up again today.

Been watching alot of One Tree Hill lol I know, how super teenage girl of me.

Slept really weird, didnt get to sleep til 3pm on monday, after not sleeping since sunday morning. Was awake like 27 hrs.

Also found a song I hadnt listened to in forever, in one of the eps. Which I initially heard through that x] cant get it as an mp3 though, so ordered the cd 😛

I feel a bit better now, after random long sleep and weird time.


6 days.
July 25, 2010, 12:35 pm
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Im hoping this doesnt last out a long time again, cos its been almost a week.

Anderson has been in contact with me again and its been really good :]

Also got to ask about what I wanted to.

Physio hurts a fair bit.

Havnt been the best at all lately.

Alot of pains.

Seen the doctor on friday, had bloods taken and such.

Have to go back over again next friday.

Hope all is well :]

Artists in the US [and possibly the UK] should read!

As a member of DA, I came across this article posted yesterday from someone I devwatch, and I would say its fairly important to any artist, and anyone who wants to protect any image they create, including photos.

Please read the entire article and make sure you aware of what has been going on, or you are leaving yourself at risk.

However do note that someone in the comments has said that they think it has been turned down by congress already.

Even if that is the case, you should be aware of what people have been trying to do.

Happy Birthday.
July 17, 2010, 2:40 pm
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Although you havnt talked to me in a couple days now, and were kinda down last we did talk.

I think about you all the time.

Now we’re the same age again.

I love you alot.

I just hope things are still the same when we next talk.

Last 2 days.
July 17, 2010, 1:12 am
Filed under: Uncategorized

Heads been kinda in a weird place, reading things I guess I shouldnt.

Implying things they probably arent.

Especially with how he described when talking to me.

I dunno, I want to be able to not get affected but I have to remain somewhat aware, regardless.

Went shopping today, got a panda charm, which is really cute, and a panda book, and a dog book x]

Tomorrow will be weird for me.

Really need a new mattress.

Had a really weird day of sleep the other day too.

Im all over the place lol.

Prepared for…wait, what?
July 15, 2010, 12:16 pm
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So I go getting myself all emotionally prepared for whatever outcome was to follow on from that previous blogpost.

The conversation comes.

And a completely different idea blindsides me.

He agrees with that I said.

I was completely shocked lol.

So things are on the score they were before, we’ve been talking alot about stuff.

His Birthday is in 3 days.

Im concerned in a weird way cos I want to ask, but then Im not sure if thats what hes being funny about today.

We’ve had a couple really good days, then he didnt come online last night, and I know why, and now hes went kinda funny so I dont really know I guess.

The saga continues huh lol.

Dad came back from the home on Sunday but was completely mental, sent to the hospital Monday morning, and they couldnt find a trigger.

His overall health is just deteriorating.

They were gonna try and send him home while he was still mental from the hospital, and they had no mission.

Though hes getting home today cos apparently hes come around alot more.

Caught up a bit with Caraline from school, which was so odd, but cool at the same time.

She looks exactly the same to me, but Im apparently way different lol.

Well anyways, hope all is well :]