This war is noise.


Mood worsens.
January 28, 2011, 11:02 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

I figured with not having to go anywhere, I’d feel more relaxed, catch up on sleep and generally feel better.

I wake up fairly late in the day to a “you’re being examined by the douches” letter.

Next friday.

I also realised this condition management program appt is the same day as my next counselling session šŸ˜ which is the thursday.

And I have to manage to get a doctors appointment that day too.

I just feel stressed about next week.

Kinda want it to fuck off and not bother arriving.

My back is bothering me, I didnt do exercises today at all, which again, regretting.

I have felt down all of today pretty much.

Still no word.

In fact I havnt heard from anyone in a bit of a while.

Then again..people easily bail out on me.

No one deems me worth putting a little fucking effort in.

Fucking fuck sake.

Im so sick and tired of this repetitive cycle of bullshit.

Of bullshit people.

People going out of their way almost to not give a single flying fuck.

Well least Im getting fucking angry than sad.

What about me is so not good enough?!

WHY DONT I FUCKING MATTER?

ALL THE POSITIVE REINFORCEMENT IN THE WORLD FROM MUSIC OR BOOKS OR WHATEVER DOESNT REALLY WORK IF AT THE END OF THE DAY – I’M ALONE.

IM ALWAYS ALONE.

Why is that always how it is. :[

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